It's been so long since i've written in here.  I decided that it was time for me to resurect this old xanga and, if nothing else, use it as a journal of sorts.  so, here i go...

I have had such an amazing weekend so far.  I've spent so much time with friends that i am starting to feel like myself again.  I am back in an element that i am comfortable in.  i wish i could say the same about home, but alas it's no longer true.  I love my family and friends back home but i just don't belong there anymore.  Everyone has moved on and has learned to live with out me, and i've learned to live without them.  That doesn't mean that i don't love them, just that i'm growing and becoming someone different than who i was.  Honestly, it is a great feeling. 

one thing that doesn't feel so great is the fact that i don't know if i'm still called to be a youth pastor.  i knew last year, pretty much with out a doubt, that i was going to do that.  now, i'm not so sure.  I don't really hear God anymore.  I can't seem to make contact.  something seems to be in the way of our comunicating with each other.  hopefully what it is will be revealed to me so that i can be back in his presence, because I really miss Him.

Ok, well it's like 2 am, and i'm exhaused.  I'm going to bed.  'night.

<><

so... the season's over, we have no more shows or rehersals.  We're all gonna go back to the "so, what should I do this Sunday" frame of mind.  A lot of us probably are going to leave Jesus in the basement with the red box, the set pieces and the cross.  If that describes you, please go back and get Him out before it's too late. 

If you're not to sure if you can keep Him around, talk to one of your friends from Tetelestai, we all love each other a lot and I'm pretty sure all of us want to help the rest of us.  We need to keep in touch and continue to encourage one another through these empty Sundays. 

Personally, I'm really happy all of you did the show and I love all of you.  Please, don't let the end of Tetelestai be the end of your relationship with God or your friends.  I"m glad we all got to do the show together, I would say we succeeded together.  Great season guys.  I love y'all.  <><

Hey guys,  I know a lot of you don't do the whole church/God/prayer thing, and if this line pertains to you just stop reading because You won't do what I ask anyways...

ok, I really need those of you who are still reading to pray for me.  I'm really struggling with some stuff right now, and I need y'all to pray for the strength it will take to ask God to help me.  I know that sounds stupid, but I'm a very stuborn person, and putting that aside is going to take a lot.  If y'all would do that, that would be soooo great.  thanks a million.   Luv y'all <><